Today, our friends Chrissie & Eric welcomed their son - Donovan Zane. I am incredibly excited for them and his big sister Serenity. My birthday gift to Donovan is the beginning of his story, from my perspective.
The story starts last September. Chrissie, Jessie, Jennie and I had planned a scrapbooking retreat in Tahlequah for late in the month. My Dad died the first week of the month and I sent an email saying I was disappearing for awhile from all gatherings til further notice. Not that much later, I decided to go on the girl's weekend anyway as scrapbooking is my creative therapy and clearly I needed something therapeutic. The weekend lived up to its billing in ways I would never have expected. The scrapbooking was lovely and I've posted about it previously. The company was dependably great. But there was one moment that I will remember forever...
We arrived on Friday evening and our stops included food and some wine/rum as is common in girls weekend adventures. Chrissie oddly decided to take a pregnancy test, just in case. Chrissie and Eric tried for years to get pregnant with Serenity and eventually with some help from a fertility Doctor they got their lovely lady. They have always wanted more, but hadn't yet gone back to the fertility Doctor for help. Generally, I think we all assumed that they would head down that path soon, but, so far, were just coasting.
Given these facts, I probably would have just had the rum anyway as the odds were low and maybe I'm a bit irresponsible? The first test was pretty inconclusive so we went about our business scrapping away with no alcohol for Chrissie, just in case. She being the responsible one.
The next day, we went and bought a more sophisticated test. Eventually, she took the test and it was very very clearly "pregnant." The reaction from all four of us was immediate. Screaming, crying, laughing, hugging, holding, remembering. In that moment, we remembered the struggles she'd had. The struggles we'd all had as mothers and in pregnancy. We remembered my Dad and how much he loved my friends and would so have wanted this for Chrissie. Jessie whispered that maybe he had a hand in this somehow and even though it made no sense it felt "right."
The thing is, as much as you love your friends, you are never there when someone finds out they are pregnant. I would have said never ever. You don't get to see that first moment of awe or share that incredible unexpected joy. It was the only time that weekend I cried and I truly sobbed. For her, for myself for our friends and families. I think it was a big step in my road back to healing and so completely incidental. The image of the four of us hugging and crying will be forever burned in my head. The moment just overflowed with emotions.
I have no idea how she managed to contain herself from telling Eric for the next 24 hours or why we didn't just jump in the car to tell him and then come back as it was maybe 45 minutes away. Whatever the reasons she just sparkled with joy as only Chrissie can for the remainder of the trip.
When we did see Eric, we got to watch her ever so gently tell him, see him figure it out, and watch as that joy spread to one very excited Daddy. Gavin was with him and shared in this second telling. I think Jessie and I had to call our husbands post-haste afterwards as how could we not tell them any longer either.
So, baby Donovan, that is how we found out you would be joining your amazing family and our circle of friends that has created its own little family of sorts. We have loved you from the first moments and always will. You can rely on us for anything as we have learned to do with your parents. You are one very lucky baby boy and I feel very lucky to be part of your circle and friends in your family.
Hugs and much love on this special day and always.
The story starts last September. Chrissie, Jessie, Jennie and I had planned a scrapbooking retreat in Tahlequah for late in the month. My Dad died the first week of the month and I sent an email saying I was disappearing for awhile from all gatherings til further notice. Not that much later, I decided to go on the girl's weekend anyway as scrapbooking is my creative therapy and clearly I needed something therapeutic. The weekend lived up to its billing in ways I would never have expected. The scrapbooking was lovely and I've posted about it previously. The company was dependably great. But there was one moment that I will remember forever...
We arrived on Friday evening and our stops included food and some wine/rum as is common in girls weekend adventures. Chrissie oddly decided to take a pregnancy test, just in case. Chrissie and Eric tried for years to get pregnant with Serenity and eventually with some help from a fertility Doctor they got their lovely lady. They have always wanted more, but hadn't yet gone back to the fertility Doctor for help. Generally, I think we all assumed that they would head down that path soon, but, so far, were just coasting.
Given these facts, I probably would have just had the rum anyway as the odds were low and maybe I'm a bit irresponsible? The first test was pretty inconclusive so we went about our business scrapping away with no alcohol for Chrissie, just in case. She being the responsible one.
The next day, we went and bought a more sophisticated test. Eventually, she took the test and it was very very clearly "pregnant." The reaction from all four of us was immediate. Screaming, crying, laughing, hugging, holding, remembering. In that moment, we remembered the struggles she'd had. The struggles we'd all had as mothers and in pregnancy. We remembered my Dad and how much he loved my friends and would so have wanted this for Chrissie. Jessie whispered that maybe he had a hand in this somehow and even though it made no sense it felt "right."
The thing is, as much as you love your friends, you are never there when someone finds out they are pregnant. I would have said never ever. You don't get to see that first moment of awe or share that incredible unexpected joy. It was the only time that weekend I cried and I truly sobbed. For her, for myself for our friends and families. I think it was a big step in my road back to healing and so completely incidental. The image of the four of us hugging and crying will be forever burned in my head. The moment just overflowed with emotions.
I have no idea how she managed to contain herself from telling Eric for the next 24 hours or why we didn't just jump in the car to tell him and then come back as it was maybe 45 minutes away. Whatever the reasons she just sparkled with joy as only Chrissie can for the remainder of the trip.
When we did see Eric, we got to watch her ever so gently tell him, see him figure it out, and watch as that joy spread to one very excited Daddy. Gavin was with him and shared in this second telling. I think Jessie and I had to call our husbands post-haste afterwards as how could we not tell them any longer either.
So, baby Donovan, that is how we found out you would be joining your amazing family and our circle of friends that has created its own little family of sorts. We have loved you from the first moments and always will. You can rely on us for anything as we have learned to do with your parents. You are one very lucky baby boy and I feel very lucky to be part of your circle and friends in your family.
Hugs and much love on this special day and always.
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